loss, love

Heartbreak of a Million Pieces

April 6, 2015

Katee Teng

Contributing Author Katee Teng

Last week I had a conversation with one of my high school students that left my heart aching. She was going through her first heartbreak. You know the kind.

I was flooded with memories of me at that age, of my first heart break. I was also seventeen. I had a boyfriend. A boy I hoped and prayed would be the one to hold my forever. Only to have him ripped out my heart and cast it away.

I remembered that feeling of having your heart drop to the floor and stayed there for what seemed like forever. Everything felt impossible… To move, to think, to breathe.

It all seems silly in retrospect, but it is so real and so powerful when I have these talks with high school students. To be fully present and embrace their pain and hanging on to truths and encouragements of a future God has promised them.

We hug, cry, laugh, pray, and pray some more.

Psalms 147:3 tells us that –  He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

God showed up in the midst of my pain. He continued to pursue and healed me. And that he would always pursue me.

Sometimes our hearts have to break into a million pieces in order for him to mold it whole again. I needed God to mold my heart to be whole again… to be wholly His. It was so hard for me to see past it at seventeen, so blurry for me to see past the pain. I’m sure you can insert any number of ages. Or even a different kind of heartbreak.

So if you’ve had something or someone rip out your heart recently, I hope that you find God in the midst of it, and I hope you allow him to mold it whole again.

I believe God is refining and tuning our hearts. I can only pray that God does this kind of refining of my heart for my whole life… even when it hurts.

Especially when it hurts.

And I hope you live with the kind of freedom that allows God to move in you when pain is trying to take up your heart. Oh, how I am so glad we are not the ones in charge of planning our lives.

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